Evil Sods and Dodgy Invitations
There will always be evil sods about – the witches and wizards seem particularly prone to these – so expect the worst, make sure your wand or other magical equipment is always kept fully charged and turn down any unexpected invitations from beautiful strangers. Those invitations lead to (a) trouble and (b) death. Face it. Why would these beautiful strangers want anything to do with you? Really! (And if you are good looking yourself, be even more careful. Make sure you know the person you’re dating, really know who they are and what their background is).
Conveniently "found" objects
Never pick up an egg that “happens to be lying around”. It’s bound to be a dragon egg. If you come across a sweet little creature that’s green and vaguely reptile like, it is a dragon. Either kill it now or notify the relevant authorities so they can do it.
Magical Worlds
If you’re a magical being, be the best you can be. If you’re not, avoid the place. Don’t assume there are no magical worlds as it will be your luck to discuss this topic with someone who not only knows there is at least one but who is highly proficient at their magical craft and won’t think twice about trying it out on you.
Status in Life
If you’re a “peasant”, get on with your life quietly. If you’re a powerful magical being expect trouble (especially from those who envy your skills). Oh and don’t be too clever but that’s a good tip for whatever world you happen to find yourself visiting, stranded on, dumped on etc etc.
Background to Magical Worlds
Always study the realm’s history, population make up and geography so you have some idea of who or what might come at you from where and why! It is also a fascinating read anyway.
Public Relations
Never annoy anyone more powerful than you. Assume everybody is more powerful than you! The Kingdom loathes show-offs so good manners, being humble and not causing trouble are all good things to adopt.
Being What You Claim to Be
Don’t dress up pretending to be a witch, fairy godmother and so on as it will only antagonize the real witches, fairy godmothers and so on. Fancy dress is something the Kingdom finds strange. The magical groups prefer people to be what they are and dress accordingly.
Authorities
Find out who the authorities are and keep your head down. Locally, find out as quickly as possible who runs the village (someone always does) and live a quiet life. Alternatively make your magical powers so magnificent it is you who runs the village and nobody argues with you. (Not a long life guarantee that one as someone always covets power and position).
The Rough Guide to Fantasyland by Diana Wynne Jones
Study and take in any information from the wonderful Rough Guide to Fantasyland so thoughtfully provided by the late Diana Wynne Jones. It applies to all fantasy worlds.
There will always be evil sods about – the witches and wizards seem particularly prone to these – so expect the worst, make sure your wand or other magical equipment is always kept fully charged and turn down any unexpected invitations from beautiful strangers. Those invitations lead to (a) trouble and (b) death. Face it. Why would these beautiful strangers want anything to do with you? Really! (And if you are good looking yourself, be even more careful. Make sure you know the person you’re dating, really know who they are and what their background is).
Conveniently "found" objects
Never pick up an egg that “happens to be lying around”. It’s bound to be a dragon egg. If you come across a sweet little creature that’s green and vaguely reptile like, it is a dragon. Either kill it now or notify the relevant authorities so they can do it.
Magical Worlds
If you’re a magical being, be the best you can be. If you’re not, avoid the place. Don’t assume there are no magical worlds as it will be your luck to discuss this topic with someone who not only knows there is at least one but who is highly proficient at their magical craft and won’t think twice about trying it out on you.
Status in Life
If you’re a “peasant”, get on with your life quietly. If you’re a powerful magical being expect trouble (especially from those who envy your skills). Oh and don’t be too clever but that’s a good tip for whatever world you happen to find yourself visiting, stranded on, dumped on etc etc.
Background to Magical Worlds
Always study the realm’s history, population make up and geography so you have some idea of who or what might come at you from where and why! It is also a fascinating read anyway.
Public Relations
Never annoy anyone more powerful than you. Assume everybody is more powerful than you! The Kingdom loathes show-offs so good manners, being humble and not causing trouble are all good things to adopt.
Being What You Claim to Be
Don’t dress up pretending to be a witch, fairy godmother and so on as it will only antagonize the real witches, fairy godmothers and so on. Fancy dress is something the Kingdom finds strange. The magical groups prefer people to be what they are and dress accordingly.
Authorities
Find out who the authorities are and keep your head down. Locally, find out as quickly as possible who runs the village (someone always does) and live a quiet life. Alternatively make your magical powers so magnificent it is you who runs the village and nobody argues with you. (Not a long life guarantee that one as someone always covets power and position).
The Rough Guide to Fantasyland by Diana Wynne Jones
Study and take in any information from the wonderful Rough Guide to Fantasyland so thoughtfully provided by the late Diana Wynne Jones. It applies to all fantasy worlds.
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