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THE DOWNSIDES OF LIVING IN A FAIRY TALE WORLD

19/2/2016

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  1. The risks of encountering monsters, ogres, dragons etc are very high.
  2. You can't get life insurance because of 1 above.
  3. There is always someone more magically powerful than you are.  So be careful who you offend.
  4. You can't trust wizards, Grand Viziers or most witches.  Treachery is as natural to them as breathing.  It pays not to get in their way (they won't think twice about getting rid of you).
  5. Building materials can be dodgy at times.  Never trust any owner of any residence made of gingerbread.  They're using it as a lure.
  6. Talking animals are common.  Do you really want to be talked down to by a cat wearing wellington boots?  If you've reached that stage in life where said cat feels justified in talking down to you, face it, you need to get your act together.
  7. Fairy godmothers are known to get their spells wrong.  Cinderella's glass slippers were glorious to look at but hell on the feet.
  8. You can't trust old women selling apples or who suddenly turn up with a spinning wheel.  The track record is not good.
  9. Transport may not be all it appears to be.  Is that coach really a coach or did it start life as a pumpkin and when will it return to that state?  Also broomsticks are phenomenally uncomfortable.
  10. If you're the  youngest of three, or a step daughter, you will have to put up with being ill treated or neglected for years before your fairy godmother deigns to turn up and start putting things right for you.
  11. Taking goodies to Grandma's house proves unexpectedly dangerous.
  12. If you are cared for by a witch and she insists you live in a tower, then you are in for a very restricted lifestyle.  Also the way out will be means by growing your hair long enough to form a thick rope-like arrangement someone can climb up.  Can you imagine how heavy that will be?
  13. Wanting to change what you are can be problematic.  Just ask The Little Mermaid.
  14. If you're invited to play a guess my name competition, bear in mind the poisonous dwarf that's asked you has got an agenda and a name you will never guess at.  You will have to spy on him to find out what you need to know.
  15. The climate can be awkward especially if it has been artificially fixed.  See The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe for further information on this.
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    Author

    I'm Allison Symes and I write novels, short stories as well as some scripts and poems.  I love setting my work in my magical world, the Fairy Kingdom, and my favourite character is Eileen, who believes hypocrisy is something that happens to other people without caring that statement is hypocritical in itself!  Eileen is huge fun to write for and about. 

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